this pilgrim’s progress

Actually, I’ve been hearing twelve. Aged twelve lately but I just thought I was being silly. I’m a woman now but this morning when I awoke I found myself like most nights these past couple of weeks, flat on my stomach, like I used to …. and … to my surprise this morning, my hands were firmly set together like I was in prayer.

So I sought the LORD in this prostrate position, hands firmly held in prayer. For an answer and HE said, twelve.

My Father was asking me, at aged twelve when I rejected HIM, what my answer would be. HE was asking me, if I would say yes, yes to the calling HE had called me into.

This is for me a very touching moment in my life for no person is exactly the same. Though in the same place, at the same time. We all experience life, differently. We all are called in a very different way. We are just all so very different and I’m the exception to the case.

We all live life in a way which has been predestined along the lines God has decreed.
What HE has said to be will be. It will come to pass. There is just no use fighting God.

So, it is my aim this year to live out my life. Aged: thirteen onwards.

I have so wanted to buy back my time which I had so faithlessly lost by my own choices and decisions. I had so wanted to take back what I had lost so haplessly. So …. carelessly. Without thought of the consequences of my youth. What I wanted and not what God wants for me in my life. And so, all my life, I have sought to find HIM and to be in this place.

This year, for me, is going to be a defining year of my life. I will retain what I had so wilfully lost by instilling my will instead of God’s. HE has so graciously set before me a life of prayer and supplication and study and seeking HIS Presence before HIM and I have finally found it in my heart to repent of my sins and follow HIM in this manner.

What will come out of this quiet and HOLY place, I do not know. I just know, out of the still and quiet place, the LORD has set before me, something which HE wants and the only answer is, yes. Yes, LORD, yes, LORD, yes yes LORD.


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