I’ve honestly have had difficulty with understanding the desolation. It has been a very hard struggle for me thought I’ve spent so many hours a week doing my observation worksheet. It was not like my other studies. Those were fairly easy as it had a very easy story line. But Isaiah moves back and forth and here and there. It was hard for me to grasp in my mind where he is going. Or to contend with all the evil and destruction and wrath of the LORD. I do not understand the wrath of the LORD. I seriously do not. The LORD has never been anything but love and hope and joy and grace and hope. He is my God of love. He always has been. I seem to attract angry people. I do not understand why people love to take out their anger on me. I’m a pushover and my life has been so happy and I think people just don’t like to see a person happy. This is my right. Jesus gave His life that I can enjoy each and every single day with Him in happiness. My husband says to me that all I ever think about is Jesus and He’s right but he’s given up and accepted that this is me.
Back to my study.
In my struggle and the pressure of work, I’ve only scanned through three chapters at a glance. So, I’ve really only missed three chapters. I like to complete my work usually but June is a particularly hard time of the year for me and I was overwhelmed with God’s wrath. Not understanding why He can be such a God.
I know in my heart He is not this kind of God for me as He has always loved me from a very young age and protected me and placed me in His sanctuary but this wrath just threw me right off. It’s hard for others around me to understand as they see Him as a God of wrath and judgement. For me, I don’t. I see this loving, kind, lovely, Father. You see, I was introduced to my Father in heaven as a child and my relationship with my own father here on earth was exceptional. So, it was easy for me to accept this loving God that I was gently taught to accept.
The LORD broke through for me last night. He was breaking through the last two chapters but last night He gave me sight.
This chapter is for me, like a vision. A picture story. A video of what had happened or what is going to happen. Without the fear of facing His wrath. As I know not His wrath, I see this like a history book. I was exceptionally good with history. After all it’s a story. Just follow the story line and it’s easy to remember the dates and times and places of things, right.
Now my mind is set with a model of the place. Inside of my mind I have at the bottom, Ephraim. And all it’s drunkenness with Judah being warned of not copying them. Where is Isaiah. I have no idea. Probably in the same place I stand, looking on. With the LORD above all of this. And place for my hebrew words to fit in place so that I can understand far greater the length and the depth and the height of His love.
This is all about the love of God you know. He only disciplines to bring back His remnant.
The LORD is a great rabbi.
What man has been unable to satisfy – God has.
Thank you for your deep heartfelt prayers for me every one.
I do not even know if you know what I mean. The most important thing is to go with the LORD and in His Spirit. He will lead. He is in control.