LORD I’m amazed by YOU how YOU LOVE me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D9S86nMqaLg

If you are not in this place, I beseech you. Find this place. Are you madly in love with JESUS. Do you ever only think about what JESUS is doing. All the time. Do you always ever think what’s all happening in heaven and what the LORD is doing or our Father who is in heaven and what HE thinks about and what HE thinks about me, you. I do. When I was young, I was seeking for this place. To see. To touch. To examine. To smell. Do you smell the fragrance of the LORD. Do you seek it. When JESUS is near, do you smell HIM. Do you smell the prayers of the saints. Do you know …. really know what is happening in the spiritual realm all around you. I do I do I do. Why. Cos all my life I’ve been searching for God in such a way that I would truly find God in my midst. Or is it. Me in HIS midst. This is what truly astonishes me. It’s God’s will yet, it’s me that’s been seeking. But then did not God put this in my heart. This desire. Is God everywhere to you. HE is always ever to me. Since I was ever ever so young. Just a babe. Knowing and believing like Abraham. Believing that even in not seeing or feeling or knowing I believed. And it just became. HE just became life in me. Real. My reality. All around me and in my mind in such a way that I could not stop thinking about my Father who is in heaven and then Christ our LORD. JESUS. Why why why. I would ask and who am I that YOU should LOVE me so much, I still ask this very question ??? I do not have the answer. I do not have it at all. But do you think I will not be finding out one day in God’s time. HIS kairos moment. When HE decides to tell me. Are you passionate for JESUS. When people look at you do they think you are crazy in love with JESUS. When people look at you and your life do they think you are crazy for JESUS. For our Father in heaven and think you’re nuts for the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. For me, I’ve been yelled at for being so. I would smile and say to the LORD. LORD JESUS, they see YOU in me LORD. All YOU in me. And then say not a word. What more can I say, it’s true and so the secret is out. I love JESUS very much. And so what. To gain the world would get me nowhere. But to gain the love and the riches of Christ, gets me everywhere in eternity purposes forevermore. So, like the apostle Paul, who went through many hardships to make the gospel of JESUS known to everyone, …. well, I’m studying Hebrews anyways, ….. so …. JESUS is speaking. So I’m jotting down what we are talking about and how I feel in my heart and what great things HE’S done for me all my life. All my life. From the day I was born, since the foundations of the world. HE surely is an amazing God. Try HIM sometimes. When you have a whiff of JESUS passing by in front of you. Paul got this right. He was there. JESUS’ Heart broke for me, us, all of us. So, when He truly got it. I get it. You might think how silly I am to be so consumed by only God. JESUS, my Father. The Holy Spirit. The thing is it’s not a silly thing. It’s a good thing. It’s a very good thing. As God said, when HE looked at what HE had created, it is good. We are berry berry good to the LORD. So very berry. Isn’t HE amazing. My God.

heaven and earth become one

It was like this. JESUS was wearing HIS shawl and HE was bent over in a relaxed position just looking at me or us. It was pure white with a thick blue line at the edge which we could see. HE was just up there, on HIS own. I was so …. perplexed and asked

LORD JESUS, YOU are the KING of kings and the LORD of lords. Should YOU not be enthroned and high and lifted up and not acting so relaxed like YOU’RE just any other Person.

HE replied

I AM your FRIEND

And I continued to worship my LORD and Master, my ADONAI, my KING, JESUS. And smiled. Like some hidden secret, not wanting anyone to know. This is how silly we are together. JESUS and me.

Our church service this morning at worship. The thing is, JESUS was there. Here with me. Here with all of us.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2bLUYz-Zvo

I get a little bit thrown off balance at times like these. A bit off ease. What about. The awesomeness of who my God is.

happy autumn

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2bLUYz-Zvo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMYReIv1ax4

Christian Digital Artwork

JESUS fashions us just the way HE desires

Related Pins = http://www.pinterest.com/knowingjesus/pins/

The LORD creates us just as HE desires. HE does as HE wants. What HE wants. How HE wants it. Why HE wants it. When HE wants it. Just the way HE wants it. Do we have a say. Not really. It has all been decided and completed since the foundations of the world.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=24tz2yp4Y-0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ry6bzm7K8K4

One thing is for certain, God’s voice is very clear and defined to me. Since I was five. So clear. And I follow HIS voice. One cannot go wrong when we follow HIS voice. It’s the right path. It’s a life of submission and surrender and lack of self. It may go along perilous paths but in the end it’s funny this. Does the LORD really want us to show our faithfulness to HIM no matter what. At the end of the day, when it’s all said and done, at least I followed the ONE who is the creator of all the heavens and the earth.

Why have I picked this picture. This is so me when I was just five, six, seven, eight and so on and so forth. O where are YOU God. Where are YOU my Father who is in heaven. I want to see YOUR face. I want to hear YOUR voice. I want everything of YOU my God. My God my God my God. I just thought you were all like me.

I truly am a blessed blessed cookie.

JESUS’ beautiful chosen bride. HIS beautiful bride. No other like me.

It was a perilous journey back to the heart of my Father’s heart. HIS Son. Christ JESUS, my LORD and Saviour.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6Bj630kLZQ

http://www.knowing-jesus.com/true-consecration/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dCh7AFvEVjk

What is the true extent of a true disciple / apostle of the LORD. I have examined this since I was a very young child. When I was young, I was stoned as I believed in God by my neighbours. The kids said that if I was a believer then I should be stoned like the apostles. So I was. As I was being stoned. Not at me. But stones thrown to me. I was reminded by the Holy Spirit in Scripture that the apostles never fought back nor cried nor said a word. To the extent that it was only revealed to my parents by neighbours when they told them what had happened. My parents did not speak to me but spoke to my brother who was six years younger than I was and he went and had a punch up and told them not to bother his sister again. They never came down to play again and moved away and my brother broke his finger in the punch out. But I remember this very well. I was told not to retaliate. By God. A terribly frightening situation as I was eventually pinned to the wall. Yet, in not retaliating I found peace in God. My Father who are THOU in heaven and HE recompensed me mightily for adhering to HIS laws and statutes. Love one another. The indwelling of the Holy Spirit was poured out on me and I was blessed beyond I could have ever imagined. I continued to play outdoors.

In this very hard and difficult matter that is called love in the New Commandment that JESUS has instructed us to live by, I have tried my best. I hope to keep the person of my youth and believe in the true innocence of being as we are called to enter into HIS kingdom with child – like faith.

Love is not a thing to be grasped. It is a thing to be given out. As the love of Christ is poured forth on us in each and every single way possible by the continuous flowing of the Holy Spirit and His indwelling, it is to be given out like a overflowing cup of water.

If in fact, we hold it back, then we are not only stopping the blessing in the lives of others but also on our very own self.

Are we not to deny self as Christ denied HIMSELF when HE went to the cross. Are we not to take up our cross daily and run a race in a manner worthy of our calling. Whom are we to think of. Ourselves or those around us. Are we babes or mature, brought with a price. Raised at a cost. Not thinking here of monetary value. But kingdom value and purposes. Have we not been given a heart to seek the LORD in every which way we can. Through HIS WORD and creation and each other and serve one another with a thankful and grateful heart all unto the LORD. Far be it for me to judge for as I judge so shall I be judged. Let me then judge myself. Has my love for one another in these trails and situations waxed cold and is there any hope for me in returning to my first LOVE in childhood as a babe in my Father’s arms of utter and passionate LOVE. For this I can tell you, honestly, I have sinned and have asked for forgiveness for the lack of love to the unlovable.

Related Pins = http://www.pinterest.com/knowingjesus/pins/

here in MY PRESENCE

This is what I have been hearing from the LORD all day long. I’ve been singing this all day long. I’m tired and worn out and there’s still so much work to be done in every single direction but the LORD says, just be undone in MY PRESENCE, MY child. I want you with ME. And I surrender and submit to my KING.

HE says, heaven and earth has become one as our hearts merge.

Once s’more.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2bLUYz-Zvo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-rW528qiYw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEBnrpeV53s

dizziness

for most people a day out is the norm, but, for me, vertigo, and I’ve no pills, omg, why did I not go to the doctor for the pills yesterday, I was there, ;( I’m a home person, always have been, once I stayed in for over two weeks straight, loved it, most would find it jail time, I call it bliss, my home is lovely, I’ve all I need in my home, with the internet, is there any need to go out at all, hahahahahhaha, except for moments of shopping and meals, nausea, I want to puke, yikes, the thing with vertigo, I can’t lie down, everything spins, when it gets so bad, I get this shot that puts me to sleep for eight hours straight, probably to keep me out of the way, hahahahahahahaha O dear me, not pleasant at all, ;/

my new study of Hebrews

Dear LORD JESUS, thank YOU for the opportunity for the study of YOUR WORD. Every WORD in YOUR WORD is God breathed and divinely inspired by YOU O LORD JESUS. Teach me O LORD to savour YOUR WORD O LORD, each and every one of YOUR WORD and may I digest it and may it pierce my heart O LORD as YOU have mentioned. Circumcise my heart with YOUR WORD O LORD that I may life a life according to YOUR statutes and ordinances in true obedience and not lip service O LORD. May my heart be fully engaged in participation with YOUR WORD. In union and communion. In full devotion. May my heart be changed in this study for the next three months. Take me to a higher place O LORD JESUS. A place where the angels tread with YOU O LORD JESUS. Where they whisper in honour of YOU. Where they tell of YOUR wonderful works O LORD. Let me be a part of YOUR great and mighty work in me O LORD JESUS. Grant me the simple and deep desire of my heart and O LORD JESUS. My heart is open to YOU O LORD JESUS. I welcome YOU in LORD JESUS. I welcome YOU in Holy Spirit. Circumcise me O LORD that as I walk with YOU, we may be one in Spirit and in TRUTH, amen amen and amen. Teach me O LORD JESUS. Teach me. Teach me. Teach me.

You would not believe what I was able to achieve. I read a short description of the letter of Hebrews. I listened to the letter four times already. Then I cried when it got to the part where Israel found it so hard but persevered and endured cos they believed in the foreshadow of what was go come, a better testament. Then I found this commentary on the letter and completed Chapter 1 with the Septuagint included and Psalm passages. What a read. Done. Chapter 1 of the study of Hebrews. Waiting to get my books so that I can just get my teeth right into the strong meat further along after completing the thirteen chapters first. I’ve listening to Hebrews everywhere.

O btw, I love my Logos Bible.

Logos Bible 5

hallowed ground

The old man decreases the longer you participate in the regeneration of the new man, a life in Christ in the Spirit by which the power comes to change. You hear the voice of God clearly telling you not to do things. You hear direction of Go…d telling you in which direction to go. You possess the fruit of the Spirit and is dead to self and all the desires of wanted you own way when you are with others. You see the path clearly through the WORD of God as God speaks through HIS statutes and ordinances. Your heart and inner man is changed day by day by the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and prodding of HIS instruction. You are not only not alone. You are told directed what to do. And. What not to do, quite clearly. Choices, right choices are made on a moment by moment basis. The circumcision of the heart and the piercing through all the facets of the five senses are enhanced and a new man, courageous and strong in God. Not in the flesh but the Spirit is on fire for JESUS. Surrounding circumstances are changed as people around change as well. The ground by which we stand is taken for the LORD. People who come along are changed by the Holy Spirit and by the LORD. It just takes one obedient servant of the LORD. HIS bond servant. Then by the resurrection power of Christ – things begin to change in the spirit realm – causing the world to change – into a better place. One by one by one by one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ES96YsNtCHY

No one could ever tell the depth by which the LORD can enter into the heart of a man which HE has created, bara. The place that only HE can touch and impart and reveal HIMSELF. No one would be able to see or gage the inner man and the intensity by which the LORD wrought by HIS HOLY FIRE. HE is a consuming FIRE. The Presence of the LORD. Fire separates impurities and finally only the pure essence of the object remains. Only Christ will remain in us and through us. I’m in a really really good place right now in my weakness. HE is strong. Christ is strong in me. Yet, I’ve scathed mountain ranges. Flown above them an soared to the heights and depths and widths and lengths of who Christ is in me. My Father’s choice. HIS blessing in my life. HIS divine decree since the foundations of the earth. I’m not looking back. I’m looking around me. What do I see. I was really touched a service today. The throne of Christ is right before me. I cried. I said, thank YOU LORD JESUS, thank YOU for my position in YOU and YOU alone. Right up close and personal. HIS throne was gold. Pure gold. Shining brightly. I was dazzled. Totally. Everywhere is JESUS to me. HE is everywhere. All around me. Surrounding me. No one can know the true heart and state of one’s heart before a HOLY God. Only God knows. HE knows me by my name. There is a deeper and higher more intimate place in the secret place of HIS wings. HIS heart. HIS sanctuary. In HIM, peace and joy and happiness and laughter is to be found in the abundance of HIS LOVE. HIS protection. Total. For in our weakness HE is strong. In our failures. HE does not ever fail us. In our defeat, HE is our LOVE. The new man.

The true state of the inner man in intimacy with the LORD God Almighty.

This is what my Father said to me last night. This is what my Father is saying to me this morning. HE is saying, I know you by the name which I have given you. HE says, the river by which you are standing in, it is a greater place than you have ever been in. My gosh, my intimacy level is deeper and closer to JESUS. A place I’ve never been before. Can you all see it. It’s pure gold around me. I’m weak and my strength is no more. I can only be in utter and complete and gracious surrender to the KING of king and the LORD of lords and I’m in this place filled with gold. Light gold. You know all these verses keep coming into my head. To my mind. The river in Ezekiel. God’s work in us. Joy. This is a joyful place. A happy place. I do not see anyone here with me. Just me. Right at the bottom of the throne of JESUS. Refiner’s FIRE. All the impurities have been cleansed away. There is only the pure HOLY throne of the LORD. Daniel. The gold flickers. I do not know if the gold is moving or not. But it’s reflecting LIGHT. In my weakness Christ is made strong in me. The power of Christ in me. The indwelling of the Holy Spirit is stronger than it has ever been. Prayer and supplication. How long have I been praying. I cannot remember. Time. There is none.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZsynL7m_1VE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzsYQiwPvc8

The LORD said much today but I have forgotten most of it. I really must jot it all down but JESUS, HE is so fast. But the one thing that is so distinct out of all HE mentioned is this.

It took three plunges of the hammer that first nail into HIS left hand.

I recall, fourteen years ago how those three plunges pierced my heart and every plunge shook my heart and soul until I could bear it no more.

The first one was hard and fast to make sure the nail was plunged in well and good. The second one to make sure it was as near to the hand as possible and the last one …. all done.

How ironic I thought all day to myself. All done. JESUS paid for our sins and it was all done and dusted. Three plunges of the hammer down on the nail.

It changed my life fourteen years ago and it’s never been the same. Funny JESUS should bring that up.

To be honest, it’s been a long trek to the end of the first part of this course in Global University. Old Testament Theology. Never thought I’d make it to the end. I have been reading for the past three months. This is the blessing the LORD has given me. HE is saying, well done, good and faithful servant. In HIS own way. I’m tired, exhausted and all beat up. But I have a plan for the next study of Hebrews. I’m going to read up on a commentary. A word by word commentary as well. A brief of the letter. And listen to Hebrews all day so it sinks in and then start the study. And then plod on for the next year and a half. To be honest, this is great fun at great cost of my heart. JESUS touches me through HIS WORD all the time. So let’s dedicate this very intimate time to the LORD at the end of my first block of Global University. To God be the GLORY. It is most evidently, HIS and HIS alone. Bystander here only.